Hear'Say to rotate members

Turning fact into fiction and back again

Hear'Say are hoping to find at least another hundred members to join
A hundred new members for Hear'Say will be introduced to the world today after a second round of auditions held over the weekend. Nearly 250 hopefuls applied for the coverted positons.
The new members will join the existing four band members to form a 104 body rotation scheme for the band. This new direction is to maintain media interest beyond the anticipated two week scope that has been predicted by pop history experts.
"This is an ideal move for us. Many were predicting that we had someone specific in mind but because of our media-friendly blandness we thought we could employ pretty much anybody - as long as they were reasonably bland themselves." said band member Noel Sullivan this morning. "We're defiitely not looking for anyone with character or personality."
The vacancy arose over the hot-heated class by Kym Marsh and Myleeneee Klass. Since the split Kym has changed her mind and re-auditioned herself for her own job only to be turned away in the first round.

"She's got a face like a constipated ass", said the blonde one, "and she never had the lifelong commitment that we all have to the band."

Marsh: Butcher's chops
A special saturday morning TV special will introduce the new one hundred members to the viewing public. The programme hosted by three pairs of Ant & Decs is expected to run for three consecutive days.