Government to get high and 'see what happens'

Turning fact into fiction and back again

The effect on MPs is unknown but experts say give it a go
An internal report published today by the Government's Drugs Select Committee has suggested that Parliament itself take lots of drugs and see what happens. 
Their data has shown that for every MP's correct decision taken four wrong decisions are made by other MPs. Whereas stoned kids make only 30 percent of wrong decisions. Based on this understanding it is expected that if MPs were permanmently high as kites then their improvement should increase by up to 300%.
Behind the scences, New Labour has endorsed the report but officially the stance on cannabis is still the same: "it's good sh#t but go to Amsterdam if you want some.. or Lambeth."
Was this man chuffing on the bellend?
In a trial run, all press engagements and select committee meetings will be performed under a heavy sweet cloud of the heavenly bud.

We're not saying anything...
Prime minister's Question Time is already performed under the influence of the righteous herb and many MPs have already stated how it improves the discussion.

"Before we would just yell at the opposition, throw some paper around and go 'Raghh!", said Liberal Democrat Charles Kennedy. "Now we just argue who's going to pay for the pizza."